The Man's Message
Established 2003 | "Tetritus fortis sine gym"
Friday, November 13, 2026
Crew Of The Weeks
This issues COTW is none other than XL legend Johnny "Potplants" Baird and Ethan Rose who deftly handled a sensitive move with grace. A short but sweet review, this team's customer was hugely appreciative of their help.
"The guys were fantastic and careful with Mum's furniture. We wouldn't hesitate to use your company again in the future. I highly recommend Johnny and Ethan as representatives of Man With A Van."
Excellent work you two, come catch Jack Tandy around the depot to collect your reward.
Xmas Party
Yep, it's that time of year already. This scribe is awaiting confirmation of the party budget from the department of treasury, so a date & venue should be announced in the next issue The Man's Message on 17 November.
In the meantime, strap on your thinking caps and vote on who you think should be awarded at the annual Lifties Awards ceremony.
Praise Liftos™.
Who deserves the Gold Liftie?
Seriously! Tell me. I need to know.
You will shortly be receiving an email or two from Jack Tandy asking you to cast your vote via a google form for a series of awards which will be announced at the Lifties Awards ceremony at the Xmas Party. These award categories include but are not limited to:
Gold Lifite, Gold Headset, Best Noob, & Best Trainer.
Get thinking, cast your vote, and Praise Liftos™!
Can you work in December?
Tell The Man your December availability.
Shifts will still be confirmed as per usual but telling the Roster Bot what your availability for our busiest month of the year looks like will determine how many new staff we need to hire. The roster bot and the chief rosterer (Matthew Windsor) thanks you in advance.
Work For The Man
The Man needs your mates. If you have a friend, acquaintance, or frenemy who you think would make a good lifting partner, get them to apply via our website.
Get your $$$
Remember, if you get them to mention your name on their application and they last three months, you will get a $200 finders fee added to your pay. What's not to love?
Casa del Cazza D
A lot can change in a fortnight.
In the last issue, The Man announced that we would being operating from Carrum Downs from this coming Monday, 16 November. Very soon after publishing, the ew owner of Cranbourne depot gave us the tap to move out ASAP.
Luckily, we were able to bring the move in date forward a week and the Cranbanger crew mobilised awesomely by packing, dismantling, stacking the old depot into a few Larges and the XL and got us set up in Cazza D by the end of Monday.
The Man sends a giant thank you to everyone from Cranbourne and Angus from the Tech dept. for helping to get our new Cazza D casa up and running in record time. The place is looking great. Surf's up, dude!
Our new address is:
53 Insight Circuit, Carrum Downs, VIC 3201
Safety Tip
An easy way to stay safe on the job is to remember the basics. Stretch it out. Regularly. Not once, not twice, but many times throughout the day. Are you about to lift something big? Stretch. Have you just lifted something big? Stretch. Have you been working for 5 hours? Stretch. Have you been sitting down all day? Stretch. Did you just have a drink? Stretch.
New draft Policy
We have a new draft policy about working past 5.5 hours for you to consider. We would love to receive your ideas and feedback, please send them through to: managers@mwav.org
Head to the Wiki > Policies > Administrative Policies > DRAFT - Working past 5.5h policy OR just click here >><< to read it and let us know what you think.
Mental Health Support
If I Can Stop One Heart from Breaking
"If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain;
If I can ease one life the aching,
Or cool one pain,
Or help one fainting robin
Unto his nest again,
I shall not live in vain."
- Emily Dickinson
There is help out there for your friends who may be struggling so pass on these numbers:
Lifeline: 13 11 14
Beyond Blue: 1300 22 4636
TWU member support: 1300 727 614 (Option 2)
The Vibe
A stunner of a result on the survey front with nary a negative review in sight. Key feedback involves you being rad and generally crushing all things moving related. Keep up the great work team!
Suggestion Box
Suggestion: "Will we be having a staff party this year?"
Response: Absolutely...ish! It will be held in December 2026 or January 2027. All will be revealed in the next issue.
Suggestion: "Can Gabriel Stibio please write a paid fortnightly segment called ‘Gabe's Gossip’ about the gossip at MWAV written in the style of "He died with a falafel in his hand"?
Response: Negotiations are underway with The current MWAV Laureate for moving based fiction. It would surely be a fillip to this masthead to include contributions from an author of Gabe's calibre.
Do you have a suggestion to make MWAV a better place to work? Submit it with complete anonymity by scanning the QR code below or click here to submit your own anonymous suggestion.
